Are You Over-Giving? 10 Tell-tale Signs Proves You’re Giving TOO MUCH!
Here are a few signs of over-giving you need to check ASAP!
Highlights:
What is over-giving?
Signs of Over-giving
How to stop being an over-giver?
Some people pride themselves on being ‘givers.’ They give and give – whether at work, with friends, or with romantic partners. Often it would feel like they were giving too much, which would lead to resentment. It would feel like people were taking too much from them and exhausting and hurting.
What is over-giving?
Over-giving is the inability to receive & the belief that one must prioritize others no matter the consequences in the hopes of being loved & appreciated. Over-giving is not the ultimate form of selflessness. Instead, it essentially comes from an inability to receive. It’s a form of overcompensation.
Signs of Over-giving
Here are a few signs of over-giving you need to check ASAP!
You get over-involved in their life
Rather than focusing on your own needs, you start focusing on theirs, and you start fulfilling their priorities as well. You begin to get involved in everything they do to make yourself feel better. You are in their every discussion.
You start feeling powerless
When they are gone, you start thinking irrationally and sometimes become needy. The longer they stay with you, the more you compare their presence to their affection.
Denial
There comes a time when you start noticing their disengagement from you. The relationship is not going well, yet you deny that you are trying too hard to save it. In your mind, you imagine a happy future for the two of you.
You try to buy their love
This is something which a lot of people do. To tell them how much you love them, you start giving them expensive products and gifts. Taking them out for lavish treats and holidays at your expense makes you think you can make them yours.
You are ready to do anything for them
You are willing to change your priorities and miss other important things to spend a few more minutes with them. At this stage, you should ask yourself, if the roles were reversed, would they do the same for you.
You analyse everything you do or say
You analyse every word they say, every move they make, and everything they do. Whenever you say or do something, you consider the repercussions. Their reaction starts playing games with your mind, and you start analysing every move you make.
You accept their bad behaviour
Everyone loses their temper a few times, but when it comes to them, you start getting used to their wrong behaviour. You start compromising with your sense of self-esteem and bend yourself to make them feel happy.
You forgive them easily
Even when they fail to wish you your birthday or forget an important event, you forgive them in a second, just after getting their single look.
You try to make things official
Trying to lock down the relationship, you try to get a commitment from them. Ultimately, you are disappointed when their idea of the future proves to be very different from what you had imagined.
You think of them- all the time
You start giving them more priority, even with your family or friends. It is not harmful to think of them in their absence, but not with a fear of losing them. You start thing about their actions so much that you fall into a spiral, making them the
biggest priority of your life. So much so that you start finding your happiness in their presence even when they don’t reciprocate the same.
“I am not enough”
This is the subconscious storyline that is the basis of these behaviors, and it never feels content or satisfying in a relationship as you would empty the bottle of your contents to feel worthy.
Therefore, you need to check these signs. Moreover, you can also practice some of these methods to stop yourself from over-giving.
How to stop being an over-giver?
· Notice the signs that you are over-giving.
· Check your expectations – givers have conscious or unconscious expectations of those they give to.
· Set healthy boundaries
· Practice enoughness
· Practice receiving
Feeling enough is an inside game – it comes from accepting yourself fully & being your own source of love and abundance.
