The dark door

I scream,
But no one can hear my voice.
I knock, but the door is stiff like a corpse.
It doesn’t move!
I wish someone just opens the white door beside it and be the angel of my life,
But the devils are so strong that they just don’t let the things to be right.

I hate black
For it absorbs the peace, the right, the goodness around.
I hate black for it heats up my body,
Making me what I am not.

I don’t remember why I was kept here.
They said I am mad.
The electric shocks that were passed through my head,
made me travel to the murder of my 3 years old kid.

Blood, all I can see is blood and my little baby sleeping on it.
I was, no! I am still a mother to her…
Can you imagine the pain?
How can I not go mad?
Tell me!
That poor little cute thing, what was her fault?

I remember She crooned A B C D in her baby voice,
I can still hear her, yes she is here!
Yes she is, right behind the white door.
She is the angel I am waiting for
To take me out of this room.

I am not mad, I just want to be free.
Mad people cannot count time,
It’s been 2 years I have been caught here.
I want to be free of this pain of loosing my life,
I want to be free of the torture of electric shock.
I want to be on the other side of the white door with my baby,
I want these devils to hear me crying and dying everyday in a new pain.
I want these devils to realise I am not mad, I just want my baby…

Set me free for I am a mother who forgot what her life was, after I became a mother to this cute little baby.
For I planned all 9 months what would I name her, what would she wear, how she would grow up, which school would she visit
and now when I look at my plans I see only me.

She is gone way before time.
He killed her to get rid of me.
How would I not go mad?
As the man I loved took away a living part of me, to go to another woman in his life.
How could you not feel the pain of losing two things at the same time?
I did not wish to live, but he proved me mad and now I am stuck here, behind this dark door.

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About the Author

A.Kameshwari is a girl with charismatic personality and is currently working as a reporter. She is someone who loves to explore new dimensions of life and to interact with people around. She is very expressive about her emotions but when she feels she cannot express herself freely, she uses her pen to say what she has to. Creative, emotional yet strong is how she describes herself. If have any suggestion, remark or comment for her, you can mail her at kameshwari.ayyala@gmail.com